5 Steps to Making Your Mentors and Managers Effective Coaches

It is unreasonable and often, irresponsible for companies to expect mentors and/or managers to be coaches. It’s a worthy goal but such an expectation without preparation can do more harm than good.

Coaching is not mentoring, and no matter why you may think so, mentoring is not coaching. And although we’d like to expect otherwise, managers are not always qualified to be real-time coaches…unless they’ve been taught to coach.

• Mentors share expertise and knowledge for the journey through the company, offering advice based on what worked for them. They provide career guidance, industry insights, and cultural wisdom, based on their point of view. That’s not coaching.
• Managers focus on results and execution, directing individual members of their teams. A manager sets expectations and monitors performance. They’re quick to evaluate performance, control the process and often suggest, “Here’s what needs to be done and how to do it.” That’s not coaching, either.
• Coaches help develop individual performance, build self-awareness, identify and teach to gaps in skill sets, and help people discover answers based on current conditions and best practices. They don’t give you a fish when you’re hungry. They teach you to fish.

The coach is oriented to change as opposed to a mentor, who is oriented towards growth. Managers are oriented toward the daily management of a team, focusing its talent and resources on achieving overall goals quarter-over-quarter.

Managers may be quick to suggest non-performance, but they may not have the time or expertise to coach people to adopt the right change, and they may be prone to simply teach people to do things the way the manager would do it.

Coaching is generally more structured and meetings are scheduled regularly. Mentoring meetings can be more informal and might happen only when the mentee needs or wants advice. Coaching is more short-term and focused on specific issues or development needs, whereas mentoring takes a longer-term view and a broader view of the mentee’s career and personal development.

Many companies hesitate on the thought of coaching from the outside because it seems expensive and they may see it as redundant to the responsibilities of mentors and managers. But if you engage the right person to coach your rising stars (or teach the mentors and managers to be effective coaches), he or she shouldn’t be around for long, and what was taught lasts until a new best practice comes along.

Furthermore, consider the cost of not coaching the mentors and managers to be effective coaches. You risk teaching unhealthy behavior through traditional-minded mentors or time-starved managers with unhealthy behaviors, themselves.

Consider a mentor with poor emotional intelligence and/or poor communications skills, or a manager who has questionable time and/or priority management, or delegation skills. What will they teach? They will teach what they know, which is not coaching.

Consider these five principles to improve your coaching program.

1. Choose mentors wisely.

Too many companies choose mentors because they’ve been around the block, succeeded in the past, or hold certain titles in the company. That’s fine if you understand the limited role of mentor and either teach mentors to coach or offer coaching outside of the mentor relationship. Monitor and review your mentors regularly. What are they teaching? Are they making appointments with mentees? Are they taking their responsibilities seriously? Do the mentees respect and value the relationship? Choose your mentors wisely to preserve the integrity of your program. Know whether the mentor is open to evolving best practices by offering coaching support to him or her.

2. Focus on the facts.

Too often, managers respond to hearsay, rumors or personal preferences when considering how someone on their team gets things done. Managers can sometimes be quick to suggest necessary change but may be unable (or not have time) to suggest how to change. Use talent assessments and a 360 survey to determine the facts, learn other perspectives on perception and performance, and align coaching priorities with the valuable time of the manager for coaching. Many managers welcome outside coaching for members of their team…or themselves.

3. Ask more than tell.

Coaching differs from mentoring and managing. Advice has a place– particularly when the coach has relevant experience. But discovery should generally precede prescription. Questions such as “What are you avoiding?” “What would your team say?” “What’s the cost of continuing this behavior?” can produce powerful insight. Mentors and managers have tendencies to suggest solutions based on their experience without understanding the person’s challenge or skill gap. Mentors tend to teach. Good managers focus on holding people to results. Great managers ask good questions, listen to the answers, and approach solutions with an opportunity for both to learn something new. Being a better listener and communicator is teachable, whether your coaching team members or their mentors and managers.

4. Self-awareness without action is meaningless.

No matter whether coaching comes from an objective third party or your mentors and managers are taught to coach, a successful coaching program begins with mentors and managers recognizing that they don’t have all the answers. Humility is perhaps the greatest component of emotional intelligence among great leaders. In every relationship, transparency and fairness are absolutely necessary to create the trust between manager, mentor, coach and client for learning and development. Coach to the solution, no matter who needs the coaching.

5. The coaching process is about change.

The end-game of coaching is about lifting up the right coaches, whether from inside or outside of the company, for long-term development and growth at every level of the company. It results in mentors and managers learning to coach in the moment. It’s about closing skill gaps and ensuring readiness in your succession plan. Finally, it’s about recognizing that change provokes resistance, and accepting that resistance is a normal reaction. And it’s about having the courage to do something about it anyway.